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“Strong Hugs, Weak Ego” – John Styn

I prefer it on the edge. I’d rather be trailblazing than enjoying the ease of a trail.
Even so, sometimes it’s hard not to feel a sting when I see others get press or recognition for things I’ve experimented with in the past.
The sting fades quickly when I remember that 1) it is the joy of discovery that gets me excited and 2) If I believe in the concepts, then I want to see them fulfilled by any and all.
Tonight I saw that “We Live In Public” won a best Doc award at Sundance. As someone who lived for 2 years in an experimental webcam house, it’s stings to see someone else get recognition. Granted, that project was 100 times more impressive and worthy of attention…but Ego can be childish.
I also was sent a link to GlobalHugTour.com tonight.
I was a bit taken aback since I had been working with a designer on “Hug Tour 2009” shirts this very week.
Obviously I want any love-based concept to succeed in any form, but my Ego likes to whine.
And fears start to creep up. Thoughts like, I may be forced to “compete” with that project for attention (and possibly money.)
Plus they use the term “Hug Ambassador,” got an endorsement from Gary Vaynerchuck, and we both want to be on Oprah!
I recognize how ridiculous it is to feel ownership over a “Hug Tour.” And Amma (The Hugging Saint) is really the Supreme Queen of Hug Tours, anyways.
So give me a moment to just let this temporary Ego surge calm down and then we can all work together to make the world more love-filled and amazing.
Okay, I’m better now.

  • Sunny


  • Tara Hunt

    I’ve totally been there. Don’t beat yourself up. Yes, it’s the spread of your awesome ideas that matter, but what you’ve lost out on is social capital/whuffie that someone else can get instead of you. But don’t worry…I know who the supreme hug master is…:)

  • Halcyon

    interesting point, Tara.
    Even with “altruistic” pursuits, there is a desire for whuffie. (Even if it is only to secure resources for further pursuits.)
    However, it is hard to defend one’s entitlement without losing the good will intended in the first place!
    (Can’t wait for your book!)
    btw, I sure hope I can get a real-life hug this year. 🙂

  • Kat

    Totally been there too. I dont know if I have ever had something like this last as long or not but it does pass. I know that those 2 reminders are the most important and have always been the way to guide me back to where I need to be.

  • Sarah

    The thing that you don’t seem to understand is that these people who are more successful at your ideas are achieving something that is outside of themselves. Look at hugnation or the hug tour and what do you see? Your face! Everything you do is about you, and the wacky things you are doing. When you try to get funding, you are not asking people to fund a project, you are asking people to support YOU. Until you stop making yourself the focus of everything you do, you will not have that kind of success.

  • Halcyon

    – Excellent feedback!

  • Jennifer/ Hug It Forward

    Just keep on getting out there and HUGGING! Thanks for joining us the other day- together we will Hug It Forward while we Hug (the) nation & CHANGE THE WORLD!
    : ) Eli and the Hug It Forward gang!

  • Halcyon

    Absolutely, Jennifer! Luckily these “ego attacks” are brief, but Love is eternal. Honored to be paddling in the same direction as all of you!

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